The first time I heard that sex is spiritual and sacred, something deep inside awakened.
From my experience and as a sex therapist, I know that sexual, spiritual, and energy are parts of one whole, one magnetic flow. Sex is a physical act that can be pure cosmic energy—a direct connection to the divine.
If you are in the energy flow of expressive sex, then you know that the Divine is most certainly a part of it—there is a sense of spiritual communion.
To fully experience sex in this divine way, we must engage in it as a sacred space.
Sex is a core function of humanity, playing an essential and immense role in the physical health and vitality of the body and the giving and receiving of love in the heart space. Sex is also a tremendous, universal force that can merge your divine essence with your body. Sex is involution (spirit descending) and evolution (physical ascending) meeting with the heart space allowing love to flow—not necessarily just romantic love.
Sacred sexuality is completely counter to what our culture presents as the modern experience of sex which is entirely externally focused.
In today’s modern culture, sex is often immersed in the objectification of another, mired in fantasy, or watched from the sidelines through porn. The connection of another’s warm flesh, heart, and soul is often taken for granted in these forums leaving many feeling empty after sexual encounters or feeling something is wrong with them for not being more satisfied.
In other spaces, sex is dirty, forbidden, or wrong. It is considered sinful and destructive for the soul unless specific rules and relationship statuses are met. Under these conditions, pleasure is often one-sided and only used as part of” wifely duties’ or for procreation-only purposes.
Why is sex the most desired experience today?
Because sex is transformational and life-changing. Because we require intimacy with another. Because we seek a connection with the Divine. Because it helps us transcend ourselves and our quotidian lives in a way no other experience does.
The truth is that most modern-day folks expect way too little from sex.
Sex is a powerful energy. It can be healing. It is beyond just penetrative sex and orgasms. Of course, nothing wrong with either one. But what if sex, experienced as sacred, could open a field of intimacy in your relationship with your lover that you never knew existed? And whether in a current relationship or not, what about having more freedom to be you and having a solid relationship with your sexual self?
Creating a Sacred Sex Container
- Remember you are a spiritual being having a human experience. You are a spiritual being created from a divine blueprint; therefore, sex—part of the human experience—was also made from the same source. Even if you are experiencing guilt, trauma triggered, or embarrassment, you are worthy of having pleasure. You also get to define what is sexual for you. With consenting partners and within the realms of both people’s boundaries, sex should occur freely.
- If you can remember and accept that you are a spiritual being having a human experience, so is your partner. Yup, that person who is the source of most of your triggers and annoys you to no end is doing the best they can. Your partner is also a sacred representation of the Divine. Don’t forget that when it comes to partnership, you get out of it what you put into it.
- Practice the act of devotion. The act of sex as worship of your partner by holding the highest vision for your partner, loving them as the divine being they are. Doing acts of love and kindness—touch, words, acts—intending to worship them, not to get them to do something for you or as payback for what you consider lacking. Practicing devotion is how you become a healer.
- Connection over penetration. People often rush to penetration and miss out on more intimate connections (heart, mind, spirit). Soul gazing and admiring each other’s body through touch allow you to slow down and connect with your lover, enabling the body to prepare for sex more authentically. For those that have experienced sexual trauma, slowing down and connecting is essential.
- Radiant afterglow. One of the often overlooked sexual opportunities happens in the recovery phase. Sharing thoughts and feelings and sharing laughter on your experience in the afterglow of sex nourishes your relationship and sexual connection. Whether you are experiencing pain or erectile issues or someone who did not have an orgasm, the after phase of any sexual engagement can be the most healing by giving and receiving loving and thoughtful touches and words. When done often, it helps keep the sacredness of the moment between sexual encounters.
Suppose you’re looking for support in creating more intimate and sacred sex in your relationship. In that case, sex therapy will allow you to explore the stories and beliefs you hold about your sex life and your sexual self and to expand what sex and sexuality mean to you. Get in touch with us today to get started with an expert sex therapist.
And if you are a woman looking for ways to redefine her sacred sexuality, a program for like-minded women will allow you to explore your stories and beliefs about feminine sexuality. Check out this program and see how it can support you.
